"Be Happy and Enjoy the Ride"

As I skid across the blacktop it sounded like my glasses had broken.  But no, I could still see.  It was just the name tag and key I wear around my neck when I ride my bike.  I put a phrase on it when I bought it:  "Be Happy and Enjoy the Ride"

Well I wasn't happy and I didn't enjoy the ride.  It was the biggest ride I had attempted this summer, working towards the Colorado mountain trails.  My goal was to get back up this long steep hill but that was not going to happen today.  A young man on his way to work quickly pulled over and got out his emergency kit.  I didn't know I would be the one needing it  this day.  Do you want to get up and see if you're ok?.   "No , I don't- I know I'm not ok".    My husband who turned around in time to see me fall when I said Oh No…...was scared.  He told me later that it does not go well with 60 year old ladies when they fall off fast moving bikes on a blacktop.  "Just lay there a minute and see how you feel"  He is always so calm and I love that because I'm not.  But I know I can't trust that calmness because he wouldn't show fear to me, he's learned to just be calm.

Sitting on the side of the bathtub he is putting soap on my road rash.  I knew he would be anxious to do that.  I read later you should take 3 or 4 ibuprofen and wait 45 minutes to clean the wounds.  I cried a lot as he poured cold water that felt like fire on my  hamburger elbow.  Was this me pleading to stop the soap and washrag?  I don't believe in rubbing skin that isn't there!- I'll take antibiotics.  I could still see that puddle of blood where I fell so I didn't want to look.  I trusted that I didn't need stitches but I knew that was what he looked for- yeah,  I hate needles!!

Accidents and trouble are so random.  Oh are they?  I did not know this would be my day of pain.  He called my daughter and told her "this is what she has as of now.  More will show up tomorrow and he was right."  I almost couldn't get out of bed.  My neck must have twisted when I turned to save my face. Even the tip of my toe hurts when I walk.

All I can think about after me is other people.  The ones who lose legs in the war battles.  Or eyes in terrorist bomb explosions.  Car wrecks that kill and cripple, - that is scary now.  Fires that take homes and special treasures.    Or cancer and the long months of treatment some of my friends have gone through to live.  Of my friend Diane who died of ALS, who had friends that held her cards so that she could keep playing with them:  and her wonderful husband who quit his job to stay home and put on her make up, do her hair, and didn't live much longer than she did.  Every day there are  people who are suffering, enduring pain, losing something they value.  And heartache.  Every day  there is so much heartache.   And everyday some grow so much closer to heaven.

It seems random.  Life is so normal and then bam- its you!  Bad action in your game.  What seems random is not, its just that we didn't know it was coming .  I keep being amazed and grateful that I did't break bones or need to go to the ER.    I think it through I know I want to hurry up and get over these injuries.  To replace my scraped up watch,  put on my  helmet, the  gloves that saved my hands, and then my ID tag that says it all:  "Be happy and Enjoy the ride" because there are still more rides and I am grateful I didn't get hit by a car, or break my head,  but just had a fall that can heal.  Thank you God!  Over and over, I see how he loves, protects and then helps me when I need it.

 Next week I can celebrate my birthday.  Again.

Holly's Letter : A Miracle Of Memories

Holly was Jayme's friend when she was 8 to 11. Out of the blue I received this letter. From: Holly D Cc: Mom Sent: Sun, Jan 6, 2013 10:31 pm Subject: Re: Jayme Holloman I actually didn't lose the silver earrings- I just found them! The butterflies that I always wore, and some cute red apple earrings! On Jan 6, 2013, at 22:23, Holly wrote: Hi Mom, I just came across an old envelope full of Jayme's head scarves & ribbon barrettes she made, with a sweet note from her mom that says: Holly, I wanted to give you some of Jayme's little "things" to remember her by. The silver earrings need polishing. Her favorite bible verse was 2 Cor 5:17 and that always reminded her of butterflies - in fact she had one pasted in her bible. And I thought you'd remember the barrettes she made 2 Cmas ago. I bet you are enjoying your new house. Love, Kaylynn I remember getting this from her and cherishing them. I loved the ice cream cone & rainbow scarves & I wore those silver earrings for years until I lost them, and I wore the ribbon barrettes too, and still have a few! I missed Jayme and thought of her often, but at that age had no concept of what heartbreak her family must have suffered - I can't imagine losing such a beautiful sister or daughter. I remember I used to think Jayme would grow up to be a fashion model because she had such a pretty smile and such nice skin, and when I started working around real fashion models with Jayme's complexion I would always think, "They're pretty, but not as pretty as Jayme would be now!" 2 Cor 5:17 is, "If any man be in Christ he is a new creation; what is old has passed away - look, what is new has come!" What a prophetic verse for Jayme who is in heaven, and even more gorgeous now than she was then! Love Hol ________________________________________________________________ Holly and Barbara, I just had a quiet time in my brown recliner by the fire and came to my computer and found this unexpected letter.  I am assuming you sent it today- the 29th anniversary of her death.  The last few yrs I have found I miss the date.  I hadn't thought of it today until I read this and looked down at the 8 on my computer date.   Of course my face has trails of tears and theres a pile of kleenex next to my computer.  There are so many things I missed with her but God has healed me to the place that actually a letter like this brings me such joy. The memory of earrings.  I so remember the butterflies.  It was one of her first words but she said it "butter..... (pause)   fi"  She was only a year and we'd ask her to say it over and over - laughing each time.   When she was five she wanted to get her ears pierced so bad.  I took the girls to have it done and she got up on the chair but she  just couldn't do it.  Tiffany who was only 2 popped up and said:  "I still want to do it".  The lady said she wouldn't force anyone to do it and she would have to want it and sit still.   Little toddler Tiff got up on that stool, sat still and got that first ear done.  Silence.  When she pierced the second one it was obvious that it created more pain than the first.  She looked so surprised and let out a cry but soon quieted when she realized SHE had earrings in and Jayme didn't.  We went home that day and Jayme was so terribly disappointed.  She had waited and waited and was just too scared.   We took care of Tiffanys' ears , they healed and Jayme still longed to wear earrings.   Worse than not having her ears done was seeing her little sister in cute earrings. Finally I told her.  Yes, Jayme- it will hurt a bit but its over quick and then you'll have earrings.  I'll buy you some nail polish if you do it.  That was all the motivation she needed.  A five year old with her own nail polish.  Of course she played "Beauty Shop" and gave everyone manicures.   Jayme always talked about Jesus from the time she was little.  She drew pictures , wrote poems, asked questions and in her heart she knew HE was her Savior.   At one point when she was so very sick I asked her "Jayme, do you want to be healed or do you want to go to heaven"?  She answered.... well, I love my family very much and want to be here but I want to see Jesus too."  There must have been a strong calling in her heart because how many 11 yr old girls can desire such an adventure to leave their family so young? Today, I cry.  I miss her again and all over.  I remember with Joy and Gratefulness.  Thank you Lord that you blessed me with that little girl for almost 12 yrs.  She was a light in many of my dark times.  She took me to the feet of Jesus where I cried at his feet and learned how much he loved us both.  I learned to look forward to seeing her again.  I know I will.  Its as real as anything and still is.  Thats the wonderful thing Jesus does for us.  He gives us hope for the things we can't see and have a hard time believing.  To me that is more real than the place I sit as I write this letter. Holly,  thank you for taking the time to write your letter of memories and share it with your mom.  Barbara, thank you for sending it today.  I had forgotten I gave you earrings and ribbons so long ago and of course I never knew that you kept them and thought about these things.  These are treasured thoughts.  I love you both. Kaylynn ____________________________________________________________________________ On Jan 8, 2013 Kaylynn- Holly and I are sitting here in tears. Holly thinks you ought to write a blog. This letter she thinks would help so many and get 100,000 hits. To think that this little girl who was too scared for pierced ears at 5 was ready to embark on the adventure of death to meet Jesus 6 years later is so amazing. For her and you to understand that she was going on an adventure to meet Jesus and to be grateful on the otherside and joyful brings so much hope. Only God could do such a thing. We love you so much. B ______________________________________________________________________ Barb,------ When Bill came home I showed him Holly's letter and my letter.  He had remembered today was the 8th and we talked about her.  How she was so different.  We always thought she would do great things, she was kind, she was beautiful and there was a quality that drew people to her.  Her death surprised us so.  It seemed like she had so much  potential and then she died.  There are many things that we don't understand on this side of life.  I have thought of starting a blog again.  There are many things I'd like to leave my children and grandchildren that I never talk about.  In person I am often superficial, distracted and light. When I write I speak with my heart in a more reflective , descriptive voice.  Sometimes I feel like another person. Barbara- did you not think this was a coincidence that you sent this today or did you know? -k ________________________________________________________________ Kaylynn- It was the Lord sovereignly delighting to shower love on you and then you showered His wisdom and love on us. God is very intentional. Also, I beg you to save your letter to us for your grandkids as a heritage. It is a beautiful testimony of God's power to draw to Himself, to heal hearts, to give courage- amazing courage to even an 11 year old, to sustain a brokenhearted family and bring them through their grief to the other side. Your letter to us is amazing. Love, Barb  I can't get over the timing of Holly finding your letter, taking the time to type it all out and email it to me (when she is on overload), and then me with a new grandbaby born the day before having time to even look at email and email Holly's find to you. God is sovereign and He desires to totally awe us with His love. ____________________________________________________________________________________ Wow! Now I am crying and have wadded tissues piling up beside my computer!  I'm so thankful for Jayme's life and her testimony, which still amazes, even 29 years later.  Much love to all of the Holloman's!  Love, Robin ______________________________________________________________________ Oh Kaylynn, this is so beautiful  --How wonderful for these people to write you this and you received on the memorial date---God is speaking eternity and His unfailing care.... I remember how Jayme loved butterflies too---and her first word---she said it so   soft   --- in her soft innocent voice......  I think this is a life-giving story, as Barbara said--and is a testimony of life and encouragement and the reality of eternity and love for Jesus in a little girls heart. I love you   and will be ecstatic, I know, when I see you and Jayme enjoying the beauties and COLORS on the other side-- "...what NEW has come"! For eternity, we will see.... Know Gods arms around you today, passionate mommy who loves her children so~  Vonnie __________________________________________________________ ________ Kaylynn, Thanks so very much for sharing this with us. I am crying too. Your words reminded me of the truth of that song that plays on the radio: "What if Your blessings come through raindrops?  What if Your healing comes through tears and what if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near? And what if the trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?"Thinking of you and praying dear friend.love, Kelly __________________________________ Thank you for sharing.  What a comfort to have friends remember the special things about your child.  What a comfort to know that you have eternity to spend with your daughter.  It's going to way more make up for what we might have missed on earth!-Vickie Glenn __________________________ Thanks for the memories... Jan 8 1984. We flew down to Las Cruces... twenty six years ago.. We that that much closer to heaven where we will be with all our loved ones. Jay _______________________________________  Dear Kaylynn, Your letter was so inspiring and I'd love to get updates on your whole family and Tiffany's kids too! I'm so glad I happened to find those things of Jayme's at such a perfect time, and I can't wait to see her in heaven!  In the meantime, let us know if you post a blog so we can all subscribe! :) Love, Holly ____________________________________________________________________________ Thank you for sharing the letters and your poignant, encouraging response. Sometimes such things leave me speechless...I have many fond, sweet memories of Jamie. She was Christina's first (and only in Phoenix) babysitter. She was such a loving, amazing young woman, so much more mature in the Lord than her 11 years. I have learned through the years that the Lord truly is our strength and our fortress in times of trouble and that it is only His grace and mercy that carries us day by day. Love, Nancy B _____________________________________________________________________________________________ Kaylynn, what astounding timing of Holly's letter!  You framed the story of receiving and responding to the letter so beautifully.  I printed it last night and read it this morning, commenting on it and reading parts of it to Rich.  Your words really gave a sense of what a dynamic, lovely, and expressive daughter Jayme was on earth.  I've always loved the name Jayme.  Thank you so very much for sharing the loving and sweet, happy memories of her.  I'll keep this letter(s) and pray for continued rich emotional well being for you and your family.  ~ Cyndy  ______________________________________________________________________________ Dear Kaylynn, I am overwhelmed by the tenderness of the Lord as He, after these many years, has shown how much He is mindful of the pain you and your family, and all of us felt in losing Jayme so soon.  We had moved to Long Beach, CA for our missionary training, but we were praying for her healing. Then one night I had a dream that she was in heaven, and the next day we heard that this was true. I think you are so right, Kaylynn, that there are so many things we don't understand on this side of eternity, but He teaches us to trust Him through the darkness. This whole amazing coincidence with Holly's letter causes me to fall in love with the Lord even more, and to anxiously await on tiptoes (thank you, Pastor Dick!) for eternity with Him and our loved ones. Thank you, dear friend, for encouraging my faith! Love,Kim E ______________________________________________________________________ The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord. -K

Last Stop: Paris !!

Paris, France

For me the night train was not so easy. I don't sleep easily with other things going on. Finally out of sheer exhaustion I went out. I tried to move to seats at the back but the conductor yelled at us to go back to our seats. Indeed, people were added along the way and every seat was full. We had a seat in the middle........

A bit of sadness these last few days for me as I sense the ending of something good. It isn't that I don't want to go home or that I'm not ready. I do and I am. But I feel the end of something wonderful coming. A time where two people who have grown to love each other over the years, dreamed a dream, took a chance and watched it happen. And it happened. I didn't think anybody could spend so much time constantly together (and like it) but we did. We learned even more about each other. We accepted. We changed. We forgave. We laughed. There were days we felt like we were going into battle and there were times we just laughed and laughed. We loved the beauty of this world that we were priviledged to see. We enjoyed the people who crossed our paths, stretched our minds and became a most important part of this trip and will live on in our memories. Getting haircuts together, running for trains, washing clothes in bathrooms sinks, watching movies in other languages, sharing new foods, experiencing new things together, helping each other not make mistakes, doing what the other person wants, and learning together. Getting home and looking back it seems somewhat surreal like, did that really happen? But when I start reading this journal or looking at pictures it all comes back. Its hard to explain but something like this changes you. I don't want to go back. I want to take this education of life and use it. Just being is so worthwhile.

Israel

(should be posted after Europe travel so out of sequence) We're finally here, in tiny Israel, the center of the world. At least so it seems, geographically, politically, historically and religiously. The Israeli flag is ubiquitous here, maybe because Israel just celebrated it's 63rd birthday, but more likely because Israelis value what's been so hard to obtain and now maintain. A blue Star of David bordered by blue bands on a white background suggests a desire for peace and hope but seems to offend most of the world.
We arrived in Tel Aviv after a 12 hour flight from Atlanta in cramped Delta seats. We had jet lag, hotel snag and felt flagged, after. ending up in a small, bleak room with two little beds on a busy street. But the chance to be horizontal was wonderful and one block away was the beautiful blue and green Mediterranean. We had falafel and hummus with Israeli wine on the beach as the sun went down ending Sabbath. You wouldn't know it was Sabbath from the bustle of secular Tel Aviv but the airport was empty when we arrived at 5pm. So far, it's a land of sabra personalities, in a Mediterranean climate, with white stone tower apartments everywhere. I guess they build upward to conserve their land for produce. Tomorrow out into the sun and to the old port city of Jaffa, where Jonah tried to escape his assignment. Tough way to get yourself back on track with your original orders.

Bill -May 2010

And I think Travel is a lot like Dancing

We are back home quickly pulled into the fast pace of life in the twenty first century. Our 3 months in Europe boxed up in the closet of our mind. It almost becomes a surreal thought, like did that really happen? But then my thoughts linger and I smile and think, yes it really happened and it was wonderful. There was a time when we were in the world with days that happened usually on a whim. We never knew who we would meet, whether we could read the menu or if we would get to where we thought we wanted to go. I smile because I lived my dream. Was it everything I thought it would be? Absolutely not! It was challenging and I was ready to go home in 2 months. Our bank account would have liked that too with the dollar so bad. There were days that seemed like a lot of work getting from one place to another by foot with a back pack hopping trains and metros. We got tired and we were frustrated. Am I glad we did it? Of course because together we have memories that will be with us forever. The most unusual experiences as we were immersed in an education of 10 countries and trying to learn what makes them what they are. Would we do it again? No, probably not that way. I appreciate rolling bags in a new way but there were places we could have, or would have never gone....... I'm just so glad I could do it. When I think back to last year at Christmas and how sick I was. How I could hardly cook, drive, or clean my house. How I wondered if I would ever feel good enough again to do this thing. Yes, it was great to feel so free. When you are away you put problems out of mind. Its good for you. We should all be a little more thoughtful about the short time we have. Whatever is in your mind think about going ahead and doing it. While you have the chance and before time slips away. For 3 months we lived everyday in the moment. Not in the past and not waiting for the future. In the moment. Smiling. Living. I feel great. Merry Christmas 2009. -K




"You have to love dancing to stick to it,"he once said. "It gives you nothing back... nothing but that single fleeting moment when you feel alive."
Which is one more reason to leave the summer paradise of St. Paul and travel to the foggy places.
Travel is the art form available to Everyman. You sit in the coffee shop in a strange city and nobody knows who you are, or cares, and so you shed your checkered past and your motley credentials and you face the day unarmed, as the great Merce did.
Bravery! Adventure! Defeat! Survival!
And onward we go and some day in the distant future, we will stop and turn around in astonishment to see all the places we've been and the heroes we were.

- Garrison Keillor , author of 77 Love

Penultimate Paris

Paris, France -Nov. 30th - Dec. 4th

Well we survived the night train pretty well. The Frenchman across the aisle finally stopped talking on his cellphone and the toddler a few rows up stopped chattering and at 12:30 the conductor turned off the overhead lights. We covered ourselves with our jackets, put masks over our eyes and plugs in our ears and surprisingly dozed off with the sway and rumble of the train. We arrived in Paris at 8:30 am as it was just getting light. Not too bad! Found the way to our hotel, dropped our packs and went in search of the Eiffel tower. A few blocks later there it was, massive but beautiful, every travelers dream. We walked down the Seine and found a warm little restaurant on a side street and full of locals and enjoyed the sound of the French language as we ate the small servings of carefully prepared food the French are famous for. I had the first good cup of tea in a month, Assam tea with milk and sugar! We took the subway to the Louvre and as everyone says, wow!, it's glass pyramids above ground and it's cavernous halls underground. We were seasoned museum- goers by this time and the Louvre was still clearly in a class by itself. The only problem was there were no English speaking docents available. The Ministry of Culture employees went on strike that day because President Sarkozy was not replacing retiring workers over the age of 50. The French frequently strike, especially in Paris, and the locals, when they heard it rolled their eyes and apologized. As a result we missed Versailles, the Orsay (impressionists) and the Pompidou(modern art-Kaylynn wanted to see more of Chagall). We decided, kind of that is,( couldn't find the subway), to walk home and got caught in a downpour. When I said this will be a great memory Kaylynn said an expletive. We still couldn't find the subway with cold rain dripping off our heads onto our glasses so we soldiered on looking under streetlamps at our wrinkled map and finally made it to the hotel. We took a picture of ourselves in the mirror to document our drowned rat misery. So, okay, let those French strike. We went to see the flying buttresses of Notre Dame and then the Jewish museum. Tracing the history of the Jews, and their frequent and universal exiles and abuse, it was clear to us that they alone have been able to maintain their culture and it must be by divine intervention. The Jewish museum workers are always the most courteous regardless of the country they're in. The most enjoyable part of Paris however is not museums but it's neighborhoods and people and at night it's lights are unsurpassed. We stayed in the Rue Cler neighborhood and enjoyed the outdoor markets, pastisseries and the French people going about their daily lives. The French tend to be petite with beautiful brown-gold eyes and oh that beautiful language. They go slower, take more time to eat and overall seem more relaxed. Understandable, given their 35 hour workweek and 8 weeks of vacation and holidays per year. We saw the Lafayette shopping area with it's store windows elaborately decorated for Christmas, reminiscent of what I've heard Macy's in New York to be like. Better than this was, the Champs-Elysees, said to be the most famous boulevard in the world. It was decorated with Christmas lights and shimmered in the rain. History has rolled down this street in all it's glory and infamy. We strolled it with our umbrella and didn't want to leave, except we were freezing, those paltry clothes again. I imagined it in July at the end of the Tour de France which we've watched every year since 1989. Good to actually see it. Finally time to say goodbye to crepes and croissants, so we took one more walk at night around the Eiffel tower, thanked God for the experiences and people of the past three months, went back to the hotel and packed for the trip home. Wonderful Europe but, like Dorothy said, there's no place like home! Maybe we'll get to return sometime but if not, we have memories for a lifetime.

Au revoir, Billy

HOLY TOLEDO!!

Toledo, Spain
Nov. 28-29th.

We left Seville and headed north again with darkening skies and dropping temperatures. These one night stays aren't easy. We heard Toledo was old Spain and that's what we found, a medieval city surrounded on three sides by a river and the fourth by a protecting wall, the streets winding, narrow and cobblestoned. We noticed very few international travelers and later found out 85% of visitors to Toledo are from Spain. It's 30 minutes from Madrid and couples and families go there for the weekend to see their national history and eat and shop. They're famous for their steel, and knife and sword shops are everywhere. We strolled the streets with the Spaniards listening to their Castellian dialect different from the Catalonian in Barcelona. We had their specialty of churros and hot chocolate and thought it was the best we had had. The next morning was rainy but we got on an open air train and toured around the outside of the city. A nice Korean lady offered kleenex to wipe the water off our seats. All the Asians speak English and are some of the nicest travelers we meet.I think they have the hardest time traveling in Europe but they are always polite despite being ignored sometimes by the Europeans. We tried to get a bus to the train station but weren't being successful when a young Japenese couple overheard us and asked if we would like to split a cab. We did, 3 euros each couple, and were there in no time. Back in Madrid we stored our packs in lockers, got on the subway and went back to city center to sightsee and eat and get ready for our night train to Paris. As you can see we move around a lot. We've noticed our shoes are wearing out as well as our clothes with such heavy use. Our bodies however are continuing to hold up well. We wondered about that last part as we boarded the train. 13 hours in seats that partially recline - oh my, I'll be crippled by morning!

Billy

Toledo an interesing mix of Jewish, Roman, Moor, and Christian. Great History, beautiful city and as interesting as Venice to me. You can wander all around and get lost. Must have a map on you. I thought it would be a hard night when the 4 guys around the hall were making lots of noise before dinner. I opened the door and saw one a guy in underwear going back in his room. Thats nothing. One guy checking in had a pink wig on with a backless dress and lots of hair on his back. The poor Asian hotelier and I gave each other raised eyebrows. I needed a good nights sleep before the night train which didn't have any beds left for us. No worries! they didn't come back to the room until next morning. See guys? I can be brief.
-Kaylynn